The bad, the good, and the scary.

In my last post, I shared how I wanted to turn to  worldly "solutions" to numb me from the pain I wanted to escape from (the bad), as well as the prompting I received, "There is healing in music" (the good). I left out another key part of my healing process, 'the scary'. 

Halloween (which happens to be my favorite holiday) seems to be a rather popular holiday in Utah as we have many haunted houses in the area that open in mid September and run through October. One of my items on my bucket list was to work in a haunted house, and in the fall of 2013, I did just that! I had bottled up anger and screams that I was itching to let out, and thanks to Nightmare on 13th, I was able to do that in a socially acceptable way and get paid to do it. There is something quite satisfying in instilling fear in another person and having them scream and flee from you. (Yes! I know how terrible it sounds, but it is in a safe and controlled environment, don't judge! lol.) Being able to scream, yell, and thrash around at the people walking through did more good for me in the months to follow, than it did to the paying customers seeking entertainment for just the one night.  As I was releasing my frustrations and negative energy at night in the haunt, I was regaining positive energy by reinforcing my hope and faith during the day in an LDS Institute choir class. For those who knew I was doing both quite contradicting things, they would often offer a 'heaven and hell' comparison inquiry to me. Though as differing both events were, I did not agree with the comparison; both activities were a necessary part of my healing process in addition to fulfilling personal desires of who I am as a person.

Maintaining a balance is important while on the road to recovery from any type of loss. While working in a haunted house may not be for everyone, there are alternative options to get that negative energy out; just don't forget to replace that energy with something positive! For some, maybe a form of exercise is the best way to get that energy out; I considered taking boxing. Another option might be therapy. Just don't forget that  you are of infinite worth and taking the time you need to better yourself is just as important as sleeping and eating everyday. Heavenly Father is willing to help you carry any burden that you will allow Him assistance. He loves you and wants you to be happy.